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>1.. Mywife and I divorced over religious differences. She thought she
>was God and I didn't.
>
>2.. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
>
>3.. I Work Hard Because Millions On Welfare Depend on Me!
>
>4.. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
>
>5.. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
>
>6. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.
>
>7.. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me
>
>8.. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
>
>9.. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe
>
>10.. I'm not a complete idiot --Some parts are missing.
>
>11.. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
>
>12. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning
>medicine.
>
>13.. God must love stupid people; He made so many.
>
>14.. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
>
>15.. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
>
>16.. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
>
>17.. Being "over the hill" is much better than being under it!
>
>18.. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.
>
>19.. Procrastinate Now!
>
>20.. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That?
>
>21.. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
>
>22.. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance
>
>23.. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!
>
>24..They call it PMS because MadCow Disease was already taken.(for
>shame!)
>
>25..He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead.
>
>26..A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand
>times the memory.
>
>27..Ham and eggs. A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for
>a pig.
>
>28.. The trouble with life is there's no background music.
>
>29.. The original point and click interface was a Smith and Wesson.
>
>30.. I smile! because I don't know what the hell is going on
 

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PurplePirate wrote:
>30.. I smile! because I don't know what the hell is going on
Hmmmm, I resemble that one most of the time. :ROFL::ROFL::ROFL:



All good ones though. :claps::claps:
 

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:ROFL::ROFL::ROFL:
 
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