Steve Saunders Goldwing Forums banner

Status
Not open for further replies.
1 - 7 of 7 Posts

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
8,072 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
imported post

[align=center]Drafting Guys Over 50
[/align] [align=center]This is funny & obviously written by a Former Soldier... [/align] [align=center]New Direction for any war: Send Service Vets over 50! [/align] [align=center][/align] [align=center]
[/align] [align=center][/align] [align=center]I am over 50 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to
track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to
join the military. They've got the whole thing ass-backwards.
Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take
us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit
until you're at least 35.
[/align] [align=center]For starters, researchers say 18-year-olds think about
sex every 10 seconds.Old guys only think about
sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000
additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.
[/align] [align=center]Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a
cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't
sleep, I'm tired and hungry.' We are impatient and maybe
letting us kill some a*****e that desperately deserves it
will make us feel better and shut us up for awhile..
[/align] [align=center]An 18-year-old doesn't even liketo get up before 10am. Old guys
always get up early to pee, so what the hell. Besides, like I
said, I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may
as well be up killing some
fanatical son-of-a-bitch. [/align] [align=center]If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where
we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number
would be a real brainteaser.
[/align] [align=center]Boot camp would be easier for old guys.. We're used to getting
screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also
developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them
for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the
screaming and yelling.
[/align] [align=center]They could lighten up on the obstacle course however... I've
been in combat and never saw a single 20-foot wall with rope
hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after
completing basic training.
[/align] [align=center]Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too... I've
never seen anyone outrun a bullet.
[/align] [align=center]An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still
learning to shave, to start a conversation with a pretty girl.
He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to
shade his eyes, not the back of his head.
[/align] [align=center]These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little
more about life before sending them off into harm's way.
[/align] [align=center]Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The
last thing an enemy would want to
see is a couple million pissed off
old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons, who know
that their best years are already behind them.
[/align] [align=center]HEY!! How about recruiting Women over 50...in menopause!!!
You think MEN have attitudes??
[/align] [align=center]Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!! If nothing else, put them on
border patrol. They'll have it secured the first night!
[/align] [align=center]Send this to all of your senior friends...it's in big type so they can read it.
[/align]
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
2,013 Posts
imported post

+1
I have tried every branch even reserves, national guard and they say I am to old.................by a couple years..................it just sucks
 
G

·
Guest
Joined
·
0 Posts
imported post

bobalou wrote:
[align=center]Old guys only think about
sex a couple of times a day
[/align]
Phew!!!.........that counts me out
:cheesygrin::leprechaun:
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
1,735 Posts
imported post

LOL
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
10,253 Posts
imported post

At 50 years old I went back to college, at first just to make my wife happy...She wanted to take computer courses, and she wanted me to take some courses to where we could go together.... Me????...I finally caved in when I found out they had an Auto Paint and Body shop courses.....So I signed up for those courses....After a year or so I started getting these recruitment letters?????...So finally after getting at least one a month or twice a month from every branch of the service....I filled out every one of them, giving my former dates of service, rank, and my job description.....Never lied about my age neither...I got a very nice letter back from the Army, Air Force, Navy, Marines, Coast Guard, National Guard....Not one accepted my applications....?????....They very nicely explained that first I had served my country, second that "Your Too Old" hit....But it worked I never got another letter.....:ROFL:....BTW My shop instructor did talk me into getting a degree, and take all of the required acidemics to get it...Made Honor Society, Phi Theta Kappa....

So yeah I qualify to serve, and kick some fanny.....
 
1 - 7 of 7 Posts
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top