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EMBARRASSING FIRST DATE
This just tells you how hard it is to be single nowadays... This
was on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno on September 7, 1999. Jay went
into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman
ever had.

The winner described her worst first date experience. There was
absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize!

She said it was midwinter...snowing and quite cold...and the guy had taken
her skiing. It was a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers,after all,
and truly had never met before. The outing was fun but relatively uneventful
until they were headed home late that afternoon.
They were driving back down the mountain when she gradually began to realize
that she should not have had that extra latte.
They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the
middle of nowhere. Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which she did
for a
while. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going, there came
a point where she told him that he had better stop and let her pee beside
the road, or it would be the front seat of his car.
They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her pants
down and started.
Unfortunately, in the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she let
her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself. Her companion stood
on the other side of the car watching for traffic and indeed was a real
gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she could think about was the
relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the situation.
Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another sensation. As she
bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were
firmly glued against the car's fender. Thoughts of tongues frozen to pump
handles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh
from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem
due to the extreme cold.

Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor she answered her date's
concerns about "what was taking so long" with a reply that indeed, she
was "freezing her butt off and needed some assistance"! He came around
the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she
looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing. She too, got the
giggles and when they finally managed to compose themselves, they assessed
her dilemma. Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were
faced with a real problem. Both agreed it would take something hot to free
her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal.

Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first place,
both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her free so, as she
looked the other way, her first time date proceeded to unzip his pants and
pee her butt off the fender.

Rescue accomplished, they returned to the car although for the remainder
of the trip home there wasn't much conversation and apparently, despite
their "intimate encounter," the two did not see one another again.

As for the Tonight Show...she took the prize hands down...or perhaps that
should be "pants down." And you thought your first date was embarrassing...
 
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