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Four of us just went on and 2 day ride to nowhere,anyhow 2 of the 4 I had never rode with before,It was a father and his son.

The father has rode for close to 50 years and the 35 or so year old son has rode for about 5. (still lives at home)



Anyhow the father has the leads and has planned the trip we are just along for the ride.

We meet at his house and our supposed to be pulling out at 7 am,well after repeatly being told to come on son,it's time to go,we finally leave at 7:40.



We stop and have breakfast at huddle house and once again we are all outside ready to go and his son is standing at the door looking at posted papers.

So when he finally gets ready we go next door to all fill our tanks,and once again we are all on our bikes leathered up helmets on and it's getting warm outside by now.



Well it is this way every stop and the dad just sits and waits, well we all do.



Finally at one stop while sitting and waiting all geared up and burning up,the dad says to me,that it just irrateshim to death that his son takes so long to get ready.

(by the way his son was on the phone texting)



So I just said he can be broke of that,after you ask is everybody ready to roll,get on your bike and go.

Let him play catch up a few times and he will catch on without every having to say a word to him....

Well he did this once and ended up about 3 miles down the road pulling over and once again we are waiting on his son.



Well once we got about 400 miles into the trip the dad says I have been everywhere he wanted to take us and he wanted someone else to take the leadand show us some new places.



Well I was picked and off we went,with the son still standing there looking in his mirror or other things he decide to do(texting on his phone, taking 5 minute's to put on his jacket and helmet,etc.



Well after every stop,when asked if everyone was ready,I did just that, we went and of course he the son was left.



Well after about 5 or 6 times of me leaving him,we never had no problems with that again,he even was the first one fired up and ready to go one time.



So did I handle this problem right or how would have you guys handled it?

Nothing was said to him,but he just figured it out,that we were not gonnatolerate it.



O by the way we didn't allow it to spoil our trip and had a great 700+ mileride.
 

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Sounds good to me. Surprised he didn't complain about being left behind. I think you handled it just right.
 

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You handled it perfectly if you wanted to train him.

Most I know would have simply said, see you at the night stop and took off.
 

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Sounds like you've trained a puppy before, too. :)


Oh this thread has me wanting to ask so many questions about the 35yo live-at-home boy, but - I won't.
 

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"The father has rode for close to 50 years and the 35 or so year old son has rode for about 5. (still lives at home)"


Unless the 'son' has some type of 'mental disorder', it sounds to me like he is just a spoiled 'mama's boy'. 35 yrs old? and living at home ?....and acting like that ?....with "NO" consideration for others ?...sounds like he either didn't want to be there in the first place, or that he didn't want to take orders from his dad. Either way IMO, 'HE' was very inconsiderate of others ...AND, I say BRAVO at the decision that you made to leave him. :D

It seems your plan was "RIGHT ON", for he straightened his act up real quick.

WAY TO GO !!!!!! :clapper:

Glad you had a good ride after all. :action::action:
 

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I was on vacation with my family of 6 one time and a friend (and his wife) decided that they wanted to travel with us. they met up with us in the Black Hill on our third day of the trip. I told them that we were having breakfast at 7:00 and leaving at 7:30. They showed up for breakfast at 7:30. I told them that we were pulling out at our planned 7:30 departure time. The kids climbed in the car and my 7 year old told them that "dad don't wait." They stood there with their mouths open as we pulled away. I don't think I have talked to the wife since.
I had traveled by bike with the husband on 5 previous trips and never had a problem. the wife thinks that whenever she felt like it, we would all leave. I wonder how mch grief I caused the poor guy.
My kids still laugh about that and it happened over 15 years ago. They still say that if I tell them that we are leaving at a certain time they expect to be left if they are not on time.
 

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So did I handle this problem right or how would have you guys handled it?

Nothing was said to him,but he just figured it out,that we were not gonnatolerate it.


That's exactly how I would have done it after the first instance of waiting. I don't see the point of making a big deal over it and lecturing someone about how they should act. That tact never works.

More effective is keeping the group operating as it should and letting the oddball comply if he wants to participate. That's easier for everyone in the long run. If he takes offence you're better off without his company.
 

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You handled it just like I would have and most likely the majority of posters in this forum.
Action speaks louder than words......
 

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:clapper::clapper::clapper::action::action::action::action::action::action:
 

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I hope his father learned from this also.That 35 year old "boy"needs a spanking and a boot out the door.
 

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You did great! Boy, that son was inconsiderate and evidently the Dad needed to be taught how to treat his son. Seems he just couldn't bring his heart to do it himself.
 

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You have done a great service to all of society..... wish there were more like you.... and more parents who would allow it to happen. I am actually shocked Dad didn't step in and call you out of line for leaving son at some point along the line. Glad it all worked out, and hopefully all learned a valuable lesson. Now, if mom will quit doing his laundry when he gets home he can actually grow a pair and become a productive member of society and you can take all the credit.







I would like to think I would handle it like this, but I am really gun shy from too many years teaching Bible Hour and having Preacher and Elders (and others)kids defended when I needed their parents to backME, theADULT,up correcting their childrens bad behavior. I think that is why I don't like being around little kids, I feel responsible if any thing goes wrong, because I believe no one else is going to step up and actually take responsibility even if it actually belongs to them.
 

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kyboy67 wrote:
So did I handle this problem right or how would have you guys handled it?
Well done Tony! I'm not sure I would have been as patient as you but I too believe you took the right course of action in the end. That kid now knows when you are leading, he'll get left behind if he screws around. Unfortunately he'll probably do the same thing to his dad next time his dad is leading, because he has been trained that it's OK.

I also agree with others on the 35yo still living at home. If he was back in the home because of a job loss, injury or whatever, that happens, but to STILL be living there at 35 is ridiculous IMHO,unless there is some disability that requires care.

John
 

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Tony,

I heartily agree with the way you lead out.

I too am one that expects things to happen at the appointed time. If I say that we are leaving at 07:45, my family knows that means the car is backing onto the street at 07:45, not that we are hollering thru the house, "hey yall, ready to go?"

If I am with others on a bike ride, we all have a list of iteneraries and stops scheduled. When we all arrive, we go in and order food. When everyone is through eating, I get up and holler "restroom break and time to go".

If they are slower, that's okay, they know what to expect and no one hollers at any one. Come the end of day, they know what hotel I'm going to register at.
 

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Reminds me of a time my ex-wife and a friend went out to eat and left the daughter of the friend with me. The kid was spoiled rotten and would never mind her parents. I had on occasion gotten on to her in front of her parents when they wouldn't say anything to the girl.

Anyhow, the little girl destroyed my son's room. I told her it had to be picked up and left like it was when she went in the room or I would spank her. She didn't and I did......lol

When her Mom came back to get her, she cried and told her Mommy that I spanked her, the woman got mad and I told her very calmly, if the girl is in my care, she will act right or be disciplined. She never stayed at my house again, but anytime still to this day if I look at her when she knows she is doing something wrong she will straighten up and act right.

Me thinks you took care of the problem like I did! Maybe it will stick with the father and he will act right from now on as well!
 

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i had a close friend who i rode with all the time, we travelled alot . well he was slow getting dressed and going. however, once started he'd ride the butts off of anyone around. steve didn't stop unless the tank was on empty. even took his pictures on the move.
needless to say, we always made good time and got where we wanted to go. just a pain waiting....

let him be slow....then don't stop as much ,so he can't text.....or just leave him home(i would)
 

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Rudy wrote:
You handled it perfectly if you wanted to train him.

Most I know would have simply said, see you at the night stop and took off.
i wouldn't have told him where the night's stop would be.....
 

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This is the exact reason my wife and I travel alone. We only have to make ourself happy. A meet and greet would be fine but I would rather get there on my own.
 

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All good points posted. I especially agree with Sethan12.
 

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Wife and I tend to ride alone for the same reasons. If anyone wants to ride with us, they are more than welcome, but if we find ourselves having to wait, or stop often for not a good reason, we won't ride with them again.

As for this guy's son, I probably would have told him to keep up or go home. I tend to get a little short with spoiled brats - regardless of their age.
 
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