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# HE WHO LAUGHS LAST, THINKS SLOWEST.


#A DAY WITHOUT SUNSHINE IS LIKE, WELL, NIGHT.

#CHANGE IS INEVITABLE, EXCEPT FROM A VENDING MACHINE.

#BACK UP MY HARD DRIVE? HOW DO I PUT IT IN REVERSE?

#THOSE WHO LIVE BY THE SWORD GET SHOT BY THOSE WHO DON'T.

#SOMETIMES I FEEL LIKE I'M DIAGONALLY PARKED IN APARALLEL UNIVERSE.

#SHE'S ALWAYS LATE. IN FACT, HER ANCESTORS ARRIVED ON THE "JUNEFLOWER"

#DESPITE THE HIGH COST OF LIVING,HAVE YOU NOTICED HOW IT REMAINS SO POPULAR?

#NOTHING IS FOOLPROOF TO A SUFFICIENTLY TALENTED FOOL.

#IF THE SHOE FITS, GET ANOTHER ONE JUST LIKE IT.

#THE THINGS THAT COME TO THOSE THAT WAIT, MAY BE THE THINGS THAT ARE LEFT BY THOSE WHO GET THERE FIRST.

#I STARTED OUT WITH NOTHING, I STILL HAVE MOST OF IT.

#LIGHT TRAVELS FASTER THAN SOUND. THIS IS WHY SOME PEOPLE APPEAR BRIGHT UNTILL YOU HEAR THEM SPEAK.

#SECOND PLACE: THE FIRST OF THE LOSERS.

#SECOUND PLACE: WHEN YOUR BEST JUST WASN'T GOOD ENOUGH.

#THE CARDIOLOGIST'S DIET: IF IT TASTES GOOD, SPIT IT OUT.

#DOCTOR TO PATIENT: I HAVE GOOD NEWS AND BAD NEWS--- THE GOOD

NEWS IS YOUR NOT A HYPONDRIAC.

kNOWN WISDOM

@ WHAT'S THE USE OF HAPPINESS? IT CAN'T BUY YOU MONEY---HENNY YOUNGMAN

@ WHAT WOULD MEN BE WITHOUT WOMEN? SCARCE, SIR, MIGHTY SCARCE.

--- MARK TWAIN----

@ BY ALL MEANS MARRY: IF YOU GET A GOOD WIFE, YOU'LL BECOME HAPPY;
@IF YOU GET A BAD ONE, YOU'LL BECOME A PHILOSOPHER.---SOCRATES----

 

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funny, and 100% true
 

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yes true
 
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