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In Honour of Stupid People . . .
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.......


On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) --"Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh!)

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On Sainsbury's peanuts --"Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)

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On Boot's Children Cough Medicine --"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those
5 year-olds with head-colds off those bulldozers.)

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On Marks &Spencer Bread Pudding --"Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought????...)

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On a Sears hairdryer --Do not use while sleeping.
(That's the only time I have to work on my hair.)

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On a bag of Fritos --You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special?)

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On a bar of Dial soap --"Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be???....)

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On some Swanson frozen dinners --"Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it'sjusta suggestion.)

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On packaging for a Rowenta iron --"Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me time?)

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On Nytol Sleep Aid --"Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(..I'm taking this because???....)

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On most brands of Christmas lights --"For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to what?)

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On a Japanese food processor --"Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

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On an American Airlines packet of nuts --"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: say what?)

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On a child's Superman costume --"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

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On a Swedish chainsaw --"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my God..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

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:cooldevil::cooldevil::cooldevil::cooldevil:
 

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Hey swaggerman, perhaps your signature re. "Smelling the Roses" should include a warning - Do not touch the thorns :dude::dude::dude:
 

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96aspencade wrote:
Hey swaggerman, perhaps your signature re. "Smelling the Roses" should include a warning - Do not touch the thorns :dude::dude::dude:
Too late, I am already in contact with my well dressed overpriced ***** of an attorney.:cooldevil:
 

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ah you laugh but chances are these have come into force after someone has complained or sued them, i remember one about not putting your dog in the microwave to dry it as a woman ha ddone just that and cooked the dog, she sued the comapny and WON

There are other directions which you should never follow, like remove tin lid then stand in boiling water for 15 minutes, it hurts i tell you
 

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Swaggerman wrote:
On a child's Superman costume --"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

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Don't laugh.I know someone who, as a youngster, broke both heels from jumping off the roof of the family home. He said the Superman costume didn't help.
 
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derekhendry wrote:
i remember one about not putting your dog in the microwave to dry it as a woman ha ddone just that and cooked the dog, she sued the comapny and WON
Yep !!!! the company was Sharp and the woman wasn't, she was American :clapper::cheeky1::leprechaun:
 

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derekhendry wrote:
There are other directions which you should never follow, like remove tin lid then stand in boiling water for 15 minutes, it hurts i tell you
Try using hot oil next time. That way at least you have a good smell as you are in pain.
 

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While in colledge one clas was business law, one fo the examples was an individual who picked up his power mower to trim the hedge and of course lost his fingers, sued and won because themower company did not put a warning label on the mower....here's your sign.
 

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papabee49 wrote:
While in colledge one clas was business law, one fo the examples was an individual who picked up his power mower to trim the hedge and of course lost his fingers, sued and won because themower company did not put a warning label on the mower....here's your sign.
In a situation like that the Jury needs slaped in the face.
 

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96aspencade wrote:
Hey swaggerman, perhaps your signature re. "Smelling the Roses" should include a warning - Do not touch the thorns :dude::dude::dude:
That would be a thorny subject...:cooldevil::cooldevil:
 

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Here's your sign
 

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One of my brothers scared my dad silly one day. He'd just eaten Cheerios for breakfast and was going to go stop a train. He'd seen it on a commercial and thought it'd be cool. I think he was 4 or 5 at the time.
 

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papabee49 wrote:
While in colledge one clas was business law, one fo the examples was an individual who picked up his power mower to trim the hedge and of course lost his fingers, sued and won because themower company did not put a warning label on the mower....here's your sign.
I'm sorry, but my opinion is that if you NEED a sticker on the deck of your lawn mower telling you not to put your hands in there, then you deserve to lose your hands...you don't need 'em anyway because you're just going to do something stupid with 'em!
 

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I bought myself a new roll on deodorant yesterday.
The instructions said ''Take off top, and push up bottom''

I'm just back from casualty. The doctor said I'll be walkingproperly by the weekend.
:cheeky1::cheeky1::cheeky1:
 

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:dude::dude::dude::clapper::clapper:
 

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A guy sued (and won) the Winnebago Corp. because he bought a new RV and, on his way home, set the cruise control and walked to the back to fix himself some coffee. RV ran off road and flipped. He got several $100k's and a new RV. This is why, at the front of the owner's manual of my dad's RV, there is a pargraph in bold on page one that says, "Do not leave the drivers seat while operating RV. Death or serious injury may result.":gunhead:
 

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john D. wrote:
A friend of mine bought a snow blower with this warning:

CAUTION DO NOT USE ON ROOF TOPS."
I grew up just outside Buffalo and yes I have used snow blowers on roof tops!! When it gets several feet deepyou have to shovel it off or face thepossibility of collapse. On occasions like the Blizzard of 77/78 we had drifts over the house and I ran the blower up the drift and cleared the top of the house. So long as you did not let it dig into the shingles it was fine.

I guess somebody can hand me my sign now:shock::shock:
 
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