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>
> After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to
> Target. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and
> preferred to get in and get out.
> Equally unfortunately, my wife is like most women - - she loved to
> browse.
> Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local
> Target:
> Dear Mrs. Samsel,
> Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a
> commotion in our store.
> We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of
> you from the store.
> Our complaints against Mr.Samsel are listed below and are documented
> by our video surveillance cameras.
>
>
> 1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's
> carts when they weren't looking.
> 2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at
> 5-minute intervals.
> 3. July 7: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming
> the ' Mission Impossible' theme.
> 4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official
> voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away.'
> 5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M's
> on layaway.
> 6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
> 7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other
> shoppers he'd invite
> them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding
> department.
> 8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began
> crying and; screamed,
> 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
> 9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a
> mirror while he picked his nose.
> 10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he
> asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.
> 11. October 3: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to
> the women's restroom.
> 12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look'
> by using different sizes of funnels.
> 13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed
> through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
> 14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he
> assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES
> AGAIN!'
> And last, but not least.
> 15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited
> awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in
> here.'
:cheeky1::cheeky1::cheeky1::cheeky1::cheeky1:
 

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I wanna party with this dude!! LMAO!! :cheeky1::cheeky1::cheeky1:
 

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an older friend of mine hated shopping with his wife so he started making out with the maniquinns and really didi get banned from one store, his wife was so embarrased she won't take him shopping anymore
 

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detdrbuzzard wrote:
an older friend of mine hated shopping with his wife so he started making out with the maniquinns and really didi get banned from one store, his wife was so embarrased she won't take him shopping anymore
Sounds like a success to me. :cooldevil:
 

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Thanks, Cousin Jack. That gives me some new things to do. :cool:
 

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New ideas cooking here, can't wait to go shopping, hmmmmm :X :cheeky1:
 
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