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  1. A shrimp's heart is in its head.
  2. The 'sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick' is said to be the toughesttongue twister in the English language.
  3. Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have over a million descendants.
  4. Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times.
  5. If the government has no knowledge of aliens, then why does Title 14,Section 1211 of the Code of Federal Regulations,implemented on July 16 1969, makeitillegal for U.S. citizens to have any contact with extraterrestrials or the ir vehicles?
  6. In every episode of Seinfeld there is a Superman somewhere.
  7. A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why.
  8. 23% of all photocopier faults world-wide are caused by people sitting on them and photocopying their butts.
  9. Most lipstick contains fish scales.
  10. Like fingerprints, everyone's tongue print is different.
  11. If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you try to suppress a sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neck and die.
  12. If you keep your eyes open by force, they can pop out.
  13. In a study of 200,000 ostriches over a period of 80 years, no one reported a single case where an ostrich buried its head in the sand.
  14. It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky.
  15. A pregnant goldfish is called a twit.
  16. More than 50% of the people in the world have never made or received a telephone call.
  17. Horses can't vomit.
  18. Butterflies taste with their feet.
  19. In 10 minutes, a hurricane releases more energy than all of the world's nuclear weapons combined.
  20. On average, 100 people choke to death on ballpoint pens every year.
  21. On average people fear spiders more than they do death.
  22. Ninety percent of New York City cabbies are recently arrived immigrants.
  23. Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating arealready married.
  24. Elephants are the only animals that can't jump.
  25. Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.
  26. It's possible to lead a cow upstairs...but not downstairs.
  27. Women blink nearly twice as much as men.
  28. It's physically impossible for you to lick your elbow.
  29. The Main Library at Indiana University sinks over an inch every year because when it was built, engineers failed too take into account theweight of all the books that would occupy the building.
  30. A snail can sleep for three years.
  31. No word in the English language rhymes with 'MONTH.'
  32. Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.
  33. The electric chair was invented by a dentist.
  34. All polar bears are left handed(pawed).
  35. In ancient Egypt , priests plucked EVERY hair from their bodies, including their eyebrows and eyelashes.
  36. An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
  37. TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.
  38. 'Go,' is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.
  39. If Barbie were life-size, her measurements would be 39-23-33. She would stand seven feet, two inches tall.
  40. A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.
  41. The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.
  42. Americans on average eat 18 acres of pizza every day.
  43. Almost everyone who reads this will try to lick their elbow.You know you did! :jumper:
 

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A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why.

I do, its the lamest sound known to man.
 

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RayandTracy wrote:
  1. A shrimp's heart is in its head. (Better than the other end I suppose)
  2. The 'sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick' is said to be the toughesttongue twister in the English language. (Thetoughest tongue twister known to man isthe 4 hook bra strap)
  3. Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have over a million descendants. (Anyone have stats on illegal aliens?)
  4. Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times. (Headbanging bacterial rats? Cool!)
  5. If the government has no knowledge of aliens, then why does Title 14,Section 1211 of the Code of Federal Regulations,implemented on July 16 1969, makeitillegal for U.S. citizens to have any contact with extraterrestrials or the ir vehicles? (For the same reason that the F-117 that crashed into the forest in California didn't exist)
  6. In every episode of Seinfeld there is a Superman somewhere. (Fortunately, in no episode of Superman does Seinfeld appear)
  7. A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why. (Because everyone blames farts on ducks)
  8. 23% of all photocopier faults world-wide are caused by people sitting on them and photocopying their butts. (60% of all nightmares experienced by office workers can be attributed to finding said copies)
  9. Most lipstick contains fish scales. (Do you kiss your mamma with that mouth?)
  10. Like fingerprints, everyone's tongue print is different. (No more blowfish on my boss' window for me!)
  11. If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you try to suppress a sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neck and die. (And if you just let it fly, you canpaint the inside ofyour cubicle in psychodelic patterns)
  12. If you keep your eyes open by force, they can pop out. (Only if your mamma smacks you in the back of your head and tells you to close your eyes before they get stuck that way)
  13. In a study of 200,000 ostriches over a period of 80 years, no one reported a single case where an ostrich buried its head in the sand. (I'm thinking the zoos and labsthey studied them in doesn't exactly have sandy ostrich beaches)
  14. It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky. (I'll defer to Pink Pork's expertise on this one)
  15. A pregnant goldfish is called a twit. (And the part that got the goldfish pregnant is called a tw...er...um...nevermind, I can't say that here)
  16. More than 50% of the people in the world have never made or received a telephone call. (I call that blind luck)
  17. Horses can't vomit. (Neither can seagulls or rats, to me this is all one big good thing...bad enough cleaning up what comes out of the other end of the horse)
  18. Butterflies taste with their feet. (Let's hope they put on clean socks that day)
  19. In 10 minutes, a hurricane releases more energy than all of the world's nuclear weapons combined. (And everyone wondered why Ireferred tomy ex-wife as "Hurricane Helen")
  20. On average, 100 people choke to death on ballpoint pens every year. (Natural selection? Quick! Someone file a class action suit against the Bic corporation for failing to have warning labels on each pen!)
  21. On average people fear spiders more than they do death. (On average, more people fear snakes more than spiders)
  22. Ninety percent of New York City cabbies are recently arrived immigrants.(This is news???)
  23. Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating arealready married. (The other 65% are socially retarded and/or mentally unbalanced. 99% of the people who use personal ads for dating lie about their physical appearance)
  24. Elephants are the only animals that can't jump. (Someone needs to tell my 1st wife this, she apparently didn't get that memo)
  25. Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older. (And that one 116 year old will take out a personal ad claiming to look just like Angelina Jolie)
  26. It's possible to lead a cow upstairs...but not downstairs. (I did not test this theory out in high school...and I will never do it again)
  27. Women blink nearly twice as much as men. (I'm thinking the jaw muscles are tied to the blink muscles somehow)
  28. It's physically impossible for you to lick your elbow. (Why would I want to? It is physically impossible for me to bite my own ear, and I'm quite ok with that, I'd look quite silly trying to do either)
  29. The Main Library at Indiana University sinks over an inch every year because when it was built, engineers failed too take into account theweight of all the books that would occupy the building. (Our job is to design it, your job is to make it work no matter how impossible the physics are...)
  30. A snail can sleep for three years.(Lucky little creep!)
  31. No word in the English language rhymes with 'MONTH.' (Wake me and the snail up when you figure out the other 2 words that fit this description)
  32. Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing. (Which explains Andy Rooney, Abe Vigoda, and Prince Charles)
  33. The electric chair was invented by a dentist. (I'm not surprised that a dentist was searching for a new way to inflict pain on his patients)
  34. All polar bears are left handed(pawed). (Someone want to wake up the snail and confirm this?)
  35. In ancient Egypt , priests plucked EVERY hair from their bodies, including their eyebrows and eyelashes. (Maybe that explains a girl I used to date? Thought she was a priest!)
  36. An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain. (I know a few humans that fit this description too)
  37. TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard. (WRONG! I can spell "QWERTYUIOP[]")
  38. 'Go,' is the shortest complete sentence in the English language. (And?)
  39. If Barbie were life-size, her measurements would be 39-23-33. She would stand seven feet, two inches tall. (And you'd still have to buy her friends)
  40. A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out. (I can honestly say that I'm not sticking around to check)
  41. The cigarette lighter was invented before the match. (And apparently, before the cigarette as well)
  42. Americans on average eat 18 acres of pizza every day. (And we wonder why we're all so fat?)
  43. Almost everyone who reads this will try to lick their elbow.You know you did! :jumper:(or you skipped the elbow and went straight for the window) ;)

Sorry, I just COULDN'T let it be!


Mike
 

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If a tree in a forest falls and there is no one around dose it made a sound????????????
 

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#17 is not true...

We had a horse that ate an entire45 gallon barrel of oats once.

The vet came over and forced a pill down its' throat.

About 15 mnutes later, all vomiting hell broke loose!!!:D:barfer::D

Never have seen vomit go so far in my life or since that daythen!:shock:

Thatlittlepill did save its' life though..
 
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